Written by Akiva

"The planned 2006 Gay Pride march in Jerusalem – whether it takes place or not - is, no doubt, triggering a number of reactions in the Jewish world. But while most discussions revolve around national and religious issues, some of us are affected on a far more personal level. For those of us who are dealing with homosexual desires, this march represents a major crossroad in our lives."    Posted :: December 2006

The planned 2006 Gay Pride march in Jerusalem – whether it takes place or not - is, no doubt, triggering a number of reactions in the Jewish world. But while most discussions revolve around national and religious issues, some of us are affected on a far more personal level. For those of us who are dealing with homosexual desires, this march represents a major crossroad in our lives.

On one hand, we can continue with unanswered questions, double lives, and feelings of emptiness as we feel left behind while everyone else seems to be finding their life-partners and settling down. Or, alternatively, we can ‘come out’ and join the parade. We can embrace - and hopefully be embraced by – the Gay Community.

To some, the choice may seem obvious. The march seems to offer so much: Glitz, glamour, freedom, liberalism, an accepting community, etc. But, remember all that glitters is not gold. I am not certain that it can fulfill all its promises.

So, don’t make any hasty decisions – just because the ‘circus has come to town’. Don’t get caught up in the event or make bold ‘coming out’ announcements. Waving rainbow flags on national TV with thousands of others will definitely provide a sense of camaraderie, but what happens after the parade, when everyone goes home?

Those of us who have this struggle owe it to ourselves to investigate all options before making decisions that could affect our entire lives, and contrary to what the Gay Movement would have us believe, other options are available. Unfortunately, many of these options have been belittled and stigmatized. The Gay Movement is very quick to cite ineffective or inhumane treatments of the past, such as exposing homosexual men to gay pornography and then giving them electrical shocks, or advising them to snap themselves with an elastic band every time they had a homosexual thought. Even if these techniques were once considered a cure for homosexuality, they are no longer.

Today therapists have a far deeper insight into the root causes of homosexuality, and it is at this deeper level that they focus. When I started reading about their theories and insights, and the life stories of people they were helping, I was amazed. It was as though they had summarized my life into a book. I realized there must be a classic pattern to the causes of same-sex attractions (SSA), and it seemed they understood these well. You may be surprised at how closely their ideas resonate with you and your experiences.